Joel Gillespie for President - Presenting My Cabinet

Along with many others I have come to the basic conclusion that the skills needed to win the presidency are very different than those needed to be the president. I wish we had better way of doing this whole election thing.

OK, another thing I believe. I believe that of the people I know, I could spend a few minutes and easily pick five or ten people who would make perfectly good presidents, people who have common sense, wisdom, an ability to work with others, integrity, humility, and a good solid work ethic.

Oops, I may have just ruled myself out. But I'd still like to be President anyway. Well, really, I'd like to organize a nationwide "nobody" vote campaign. Now that would get the politicians attention if nobody voted!

But somebody's got to do it, and I think I would like being President. Having a chief of staff who can just tell me everyday what I need to do, and who would also watch my back, and wake me up for key appointments - that would be way cool. Having people to write speeches would be the bomb. I'm tired of writing speeches (there is an elderly man in our congregation who likes to tell me after a sermon, "good speech!" And getting to meet all those officials from other countries, well, I think I'd be good at that. But I don't have a ranch to take them to, or an island. Hmm. I'd need to figure that out. It would be super to have a cabinet, all these smart people around me to help me figure out what to do. I'd like that.

OK, starting with Chief of Staff, that would have to be my good friend Forrest Tilley. He is well organized, protective, able to manage lots of difficult people, and would keep the office tidy. He is the man.

For the EPA I think I'd go with Jeffrey Sykes - a good writer, passionate environmentalist, and nice guy.

For HHS, or whatever they call it now, Cara Michele maybe. But she might not like all the office work.

For Surgeon General I'd go with Joe Guarino. Actually Joe would be a much better President than me. I could ask him to be the VP in title, and I could just say first day, here Joe, you have the reins, wake me up when you need me. So, if Joe is VP, Maybe Hogg for surgeon general; he has passion about health care issues and understands what it is like for ordinary folks (not that he is merely ordinary) to get health care. He would kick some butt.

For National Security Adviser I'd go with my good friend Sam Gaines. He knows everything about everything. Really, he does. He's amazing.

For Defense Secretary, hmm, maybe Fec Stench. But then, I was thinking it would really spice things up to have a curmudgeon for a Press Secretary. I mean, if I really wanted someone who could talk for half an hour and say nothing I'd just choose myself. Instead, I'm thinking Fec Stench. But he would also be a good Secretary of Defense.

if Fec were Secretary of Defense I think I'd go with Sarah Beth Jones as Press Secretary. She's funny and smart. I would like to hide in the audience in disguise and ask her questions. But if she didn't want that job she could be Secretary of Education.

For CIA director I think I'd go with the Troublemaker. Give that guy the tools down at the CIA building and the sky is the limit as to what he could find out about our enemies, oops, and maybe me....

For FBI Director I am thinking maybe Ed Cone. It's hard to figure out just where to put Ed. But I'd like a guy in a briefing who can just say something like "John Jones has a great take on illegal weapons here." I mean, short, sweet, and to the point. I don't like long meetings.

Poet Laureate? Well, that would have to be Billy Jones for sure.

Secretary of State? I'm thinking my friend Kyle Suggs. He gets along with everybody. Or if he didn't want to do it maybe I could go with Steadman Harrison. He has been almost everywhere in the world already.

Attorney General. Hmmm. I don't know that many lawyers. I need help on that one.

Department of Homeland Security? I'm thinking Mary Rakestraw for some reason.

I think Dr. Johnetta Cole would also be a good Secretary of State or Education Secretary , so maybe I need to go back and start over.

Or not. Being President is hard. I'm tired. Time for a nap.

Joel